25 Printable Non-Candy Valentines

While Valentine's Day is typically associated with sweet treats, not every valentine has to include candy! Check out these non-candy valentines for more savory or non-edible goodie options.

1. Nose Picking Valentine

Printable nose picking valentine

These punny valentines come in four different colors and you can pair them with a fun pencil, a glow stick, or some other long, skinny toy that will fit in the 'nostril.'

2. Crazy Straw Milkshake Valentine

Printable milkshake crazy straw valentine
Complete these retro milkshake cards with a heart-shaped crazy straw! The ones pictures above are from the dollar store - easy peasy.

3. Paintbrush Valentine

Printable paintbrush valentine

Pair these artsy paintbrush valentines with a tiny watercolor set for a fun activity! These little paint sets can also be found at the dollar store.

4. Rainbow Fossil Valentine

Printable rainbow dinosaur valentine

This file comes with both a warm-color and a cool-color version as pictured above. Works great with a fun dino-themed pencil!

 5. Pringles Valentine

Printable pringle valentines

Nothing pairs better than a little somethin' salty with a little somethin' sweet! Break the monotony of candy valentines with some Pringles and a cute message.

6. Pug Hugger Valentine

Printable pug hugger valentine

This digital download comes with two text options: one that says "Pugs & Kisses" as pictured above and another that says "Happy Valentine's Day." These little huggers can hold pencil sharpeners or any kind of small toy. Looking for another animal besides pugs? I've got dozens of options!

7. Cactus Valentine

Printable cactus valentine

These friendly cacti are designed to hold a pencil - make it extra fun by using a sparkly or cactus-themed pencil.

8. Snot Balloon Valentine

Printable snot valentine

Is your kid not into cutesy valentines? Allow me to present... a booger joke valentine! Use a snot-colored balloon for the best effect.

9. Highlighter Valentine

Printable highlighter valentine

This highlighter valentine comes with two versions as pictured above: one for skinny highlighters and one for regular highlighters.

10. Socks Valentine

Printable socks valentine

Looking for a unique and useful valentine? Pick up some socks and wrap them in these bands, which require minimal ink. I found the socks pictured at Target for $1!

11. Hot Air Balloon Valentine

Printable hot air balloon valentine

These balloon valentines can be handed out at a classroom party or easily mailed to friends and family - they are designed to fit in an A7 envelope.

12. Lego Valentine

Printable lego valentine

Grab and some building blocks and treat bags from Party City or the dollar store and voilà! A fun, non-candy valentine.

13. Skateboard Valentine

Printable skateboard valentine

Perfect for all the sk8er boys and girls out there! This valentine can be printed on kraft paper as shown above or you can use white or another light-colored card stock.

14. Dinosaur Toy Valentine

Printable dinosaur toy valentine

This digital download comes in two colorways and two sizes, so you can print on white or kraft paper and use big or small dinosaur toys.

15. Sunglasses Valentine

Printable sunglasses valentine

Simply fold this nose/mustache combo over the nose bridge of some fun heart-shaped sunglasses!

16. Wooly Mammoth Valentine

Printable wooly mammoth valentine

Cut along the dotted lines with an X-acto knife and slide a pencil into the wooly mammoth's tusks!

17. Whoopee Cushion Valentine

Printable whoopee cushion valentine

Hand out whoopee cushions to kids at your own risk...you might want to save these valentines for the end of the day to avoid a cacophony of farts!

18. Lip Balm Valentine

Printable lip balm valentine

You can never have enough chapstick around! Give the people what they really want for Valentine's Day.

19. Goldfish Valentines

Printable goldfish valentine

 This digital download comes with three different messages as shown above. Put the card in a treat bag with some goldfish for savory aquatic treat!

20. Honey Stick Valentine

Printable honey stick valentine

Honey sticks are a great candy alternative if you've got a sweet tooth but still want to do something healthy!

21. Zombie Nose Picking Valentine

PRintable zombie nose picking valentine

In the mood for some gore this Valentine's Day? Stick a pencil or a honey stick right through this zombie's brain!

22. Friendship Bracelet Valentine

Printable friendship bracelet valentine

This valentine comes with two versions as pictured: one with a bubble around the thumbs up emoji that is best for beaded bracelets, and one without a bubble that works best with knotted friendship bracelets.

23. Slime Snot Valentine

Printable slime snot valentine

 Put some green slime in a small plastic baggie for maximum grossness!

24. Bath Bomb Valentine

Printable bath bomb valentine

Who couldn't use a nice relaxing bath on Valentine's Day?!

25. Blowfish Valentine

Printable blowfish valentine

Give these blowfish some gum or bubbles to hold to complete the joke!


Didn't find what you were looking for? Check out my entire collection of printable valentines


Tiffany Everett

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